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The third quarter is officially underway. That means we are half way through the year.

How much have you achieved on that list you made back in December? Hopefully you can check off at least one thing. Great if you can check off several.

The halfway mark is usually a good time to stop for a minute and check in with yourself. What’s working and what isn’t? What changes or improvements need to be made?

There’s still time to develop a personal strategic action plan so that 2016 does not find you standing still in the current status quo. It’s great if things are going well. However, that is not an invitation to become complacent. What do you want to be stronger in next year? Whatever it is, now is the time to begin strategizing how to achieve that.

What’s your plan for achieving more balance? Yes, you need a plan, otherwise it’s just a wish and you’re hoping balance will come out of the madness. You know my POV on hope: It’s not a strategy.

What’s on your plate that shouldn’t be there because you didn’t say no? What are you owning that is not yours to own because you feel compelled to rescue someone even though it stretches you way too thin? Have you trained people, especially family to rely on you for everything?

What is going on in your industry or your place of employment that you should be more on top of? Take some time to lift your head and quietly survey what’s going on?

A lot of companies are currently going through or planning reorganizations. If the company you work for is one of them, pay attention. Don’t get caught off guard. Take an inventory of your skills and expertise and understand how they are transferable. If your skills are not up to date, develop a plan to remedy that. There are too many resources that are free or inexpensive that can help you acquire competency in key skills. Invest in yourself. Don’t get left behind.

DebTalks™ has spent the last few weeks decoding “What do they mean when they say…?” performance evaluation speak. All of the scenarios were based on actual occurrences. If any of the scenarios hit home, what are you doing to counter “what they said” in your next evaluation discussion? As noted, leaving isn’t always the solve. Download a copy of  Five Steps to Becoming Politically Savvy

Finally, what are you reading that will ignite your imagination? There’s nothing like a good story to engage your power of imagination. For me, it’s spies and intrigue. Anything by Daniel Silva, David Baldacci or Walter Mosley. It’s like going on vacation without having to fight airports and airlines. It’s cheaper too.

Until next time, Believe and Live Forward!

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The New Year is under way and a lot of us have been working the last few days to stay on track with our goals and objectives for 2015.

The New Year always presents a clean slate enabling us to start over and try to get right what we didn’t quite accomplish in the last year.  For some, 2015 includes a different direction altogether.  Any time is a good time to start anew, but January seems to be when we give ourselves permission to wipe the slate clean and start over.  Setting goals and objectives are good ways to help us set a direction.

Here’s a secret:

In addition to setting goals for ourselves, setting intentions is the single most important thing you can do for yourself if you truly want to achieve your goals.

What’s the difference between a goal and an intention?

Goals are what you would like to achieve.  An intention is having your mind, attention or will concentrated on something or some end or purpose, according to Merriam Webster.

Another way to consider this is that your New Years resolutions and personal goals are what you would like to experience.  Your intention is your mindset and your plan of action.

Without a plan of action, your goals and resolutions become a well thought out wish list that you are hoping will come to fruition.  A wish list is not a plan and hope is not a strategy.

Hope is a desire or expectation for success.  Like its conjoined twin, faith, it needs to be put to work, for it is through your work – your intention, your plan of action – that hope and faith are demonstrated and your goals actualized.

How do we set our intention? Make up our mind to be all-in, fully committed and develop a plan of action.

Setting our intention is as much a spiritual act as anything else    Dr. Wayne Dyer suggests in his book, The Power of Intention, that intention is actually a field of energy, a silent partner that is accessible to all of us all of the time to aid us in fulfilling what it is we say we want.  Intention is a tool that can be put to work.

The act of setting our intention:

• Be clear and specific about what you desire.  When we are vague, it is difficult to provide direction and difficult for others to assist us in accomplishing our goals.
• Align your thinking and feeling.  Believe you are worthy of receiving it. Believe it is possible to have it.  When your thoughts and feelings are not in alignment, that is, you don’t believe you are worthy or that what you desire is possible, it is the same as a house being divided against itself.  A house divided cannot stand. Thoughts and feelings not in alignment cannot produce desirable results.
• Engage your power of imagination to see and feel your desired outcome.   Your imagination is the most powerful gift you have.  The ability to image that which is not yet formed in the outer.   What does it look like?  How does it feel?
•  Write out your intention:  Writing helps to impress it on your consciousness and is a reminder that you can look at every day.

Take some time to think through what you would like your end result to be and set your intention for that right now.

Today, I am declaring my intention to__________________

Use this as an affirmation to help keep you focused when the noise of the world becomes too distracting.

Here’s to YOU 3.0!    Be well and prosper!

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Well, it is finally here and you are among the first to hear about it. My book,

The Young Professional’s Handbook
What You Need to Know Before and

After You Get the Job

The Young Professional’s Handbook is Intended to be a primer for young men and women entering the professional workforce, it may also be of help to parents, teachers, counselors and professors.

The Young Professional’s Handbook is divided into three sections:

I. Getting the Job

II. Keeping the Job

III. Professional Development

The chapters (16 in total) in each section answer some key questions and provide guidance on a number of topics from how to research an industry in general and a company in particular to how to Manage Up. There are also chapters on Employee Agreements including what is a morals clause, asking Informed Questions, Business socializing, E-mail protocol and how to become a Student of Your Craft.  There is also a list of resources.

As you will read in the introduction, the idea for this book came after experiencing and observing over the years, young people in different states of unpreparedness for either interviewing or conducting themselves in a professional setting.

My hope is that it will be of some assistance to our young men and women as they begin their professional journey.

Available on Amazon.com and Kindle 

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Not Having a Strong Professional Image

Fourth in the Roadblock to Success series.

Part one: Black Women On Television

Part two:  Who’s Holding Your Ladder

Part three:  Where’d You Get Those Shoes?

Is your professional image what it should be or what it needs to be?  Another way to ask this is, how do others view you really? Are you perceived the way you think you are? More importantly, are you perceived the way you want to be?

Your image is more than how you look.  Your professional image is about your work and management style and attitude.  And style and attitude are about energy.  A significant part of your image – how people – in this case, your peers, colleagues and executive leadership view you, how they regard or consider you, has to do with the level and quality of energy you consistently display.

The graphic to your left illustrates how our facial expressions communicate your attitude and energy level.

Here are some self-awareness questions:

• How are you showing up? What attitude and emotion do you display most often?
• Are your frowns of intense concentration misinterpreted as anger?

• Which of the faces in the illustration would best represent your daily attitude and enthusiasm on average?
• Which of the faces in the illustration would best represent you during high pressure periods?
• Do you bring high positive and constructive energy to what you do? Or a low level of energy that suggests low enthusiasm and disinterest for what you do?
• Are you respected on your team and within your organization or just tolerated?
• Are you conscious of your emotional energy at work, particularly when interacting with others?    Why is this important?  Because people can feel your energy.  Your energy precedes you.  That pop culture colloquialism “I feel you” is not just a flippant phrase.  It’s science.  Your energy signature precedes you and shows up in everything you do including how you dress. Your energy level presents itself in your voice, your communication style and your facial expressions and body language.
• What is your communication style? Is it direct or indirect?
• Do you speak clearly, or are people constantly asking you to repeat yourself?
• Do you respond to questions with clear and concise answers or do people have to unpack your response?

There are essentially 4 communication styles and depending on the source or assessment tool, they have different labels: Direct, Indirect, Open and Closed.

In an article Black Women @ Work in the November 2014 issue of Essence Magazine , writer Tanisha Sykes discusses four basic communication styles – with clever labels – that are present in the work place:  The Isolated Achiever, the Dutiful Conversationalist, the Safe Communicator and the Expressive Connector.

Not sure what your communication style is, take a communication style assessment to assist you in figuring it out.  Not only is it important to know what your dominant communication style is, you need to know and understand the communication style of those you work with most closely, including direct reports, colleagues and executive leadership.

If you are a team leader, supervisor or manager, how do you regard those on your team?  Do they work for you or work with you?  This is not merely semantics.  There is a difference and the truth of your attitude towards the people on your team makes a big difference in how you are perceived.

Every one of these dynamics plays a part in how you are perceived and why you are taken seriously or not.

If you haven’t already, get a handle on how others really view you.  A 360 assessment is invaluable feedback for this. If your organization does not provide 360 evaluations, work with an executive coach to coordinate and facilitate one for you. It is well worth the investment.

Also get a better understanding of your energy and your attitude so that you can be in better control of your image and its impact on your career trajectory.  (I begin work with all of my clients with an Energy Leadership assessment.  This helps them better understand the type of energy they display under normal circumstances as well as under stress. It is invaluable for making conscious choices about how to respond to the myriad situations they encounter.)

In the final analysis, while ultimately you cannot control what others think about you, you can control how you show up.  How you show up can greatly influence how you are perceived.  As the authors of the Little Black Book of Success note, “what people perceive is what they usually believe”.

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When Your Personal Style Is A Professional Distraction

Third in a series.

From the start let me just establish that I am not advising or suggesting you change your personal style.   However, in the course of exploring and examining what could be keeping professional women of color from being taken seriously, in discussion, some women have offered that they were engaged in conversation around their style preferences more often than the projects they were leading or participating in.

Their knowledge and expertise were dismissed when it came to the work, but sought after when it came to fashion and shopping.

How do you manage those incidents without being rude?  Acknowledge the compliment then immediately turn the conversation to the real subject; why everyone got out of bed that morning and convened at this place called the office.  Keep the conversation focused on the work.

However, if you find your fashion sensibility constantly the topic of discussion, consider whether your personal style is a distraction in the environment in which you work.  More importantly, is it impeding management’s ability to really see your capabilities?

If colleagues and key stake holders are paying more attention to what you are wearing rather than what you are doing, perhaps it is time to take a personal brand and image audit.  It may not seem fair, but you have probably figured out already that very little in life is. 

Here are some self-auditing questions that can assist you in determining whether your style is a distraction in the office.

What do you want your everyday look to say about you?

What is the dress code in your place of employment?

• Most companies today have adopted a business casual dress code.  If you are not sure how business casual is defined where you work, consult the employee manual or check in with HR.  There are also countless resources online to help you unravel this.
• Pay attention to how the managers and directors and executive leadership dress.  This is particularly important if you aspire to any of those levels.

On any given day, where do you look like you are going?

• Work
• On a date
• The club
• Hanging out with friends
• The Health club
• Set of a reality TV show
• Fashion shoot

How often does someone comment on what you are wearing?

What are the comments about?

Do you consider yourself fashion forward? Are you up on and wear the latest fashions and hottest designers?  That’s fine, but does that make you stand out from your peers?  If it does, it probably is not a good thing.  Why?  People speculate and make judgments all the time about how other people spend their money.

Do you brag about your shopping exploits? Nothing helps make your personal style a distraction than this.

Do you have a new pair of shoes or two every week? While it may not be anybody’s business, it tells people what your focus is.  Again, it may not be fair, but that’s the reality.  How’s this for unconscious bias: “if we promote her she’s only going to buy more shoes.”

Do your clothes fit properly? Nothing sends a bad impression more than clothes that are too tight, too short, or cut too low.  It begs the question what type of attention are you vying for?

Is your color palette visible from two blocks away?  Loud colors and prints are not only distracting, but are irritants to the eyes with prolonged exposure. Wear them in moderation or balanced with darker or muted colors. Read up on the science of colors and what they communicate.

If you work in an environment that does not have a dress code, please do not suspend common sense.  It is still a place of business.  I dedicate an entire chapter to dressing for success – or not – in my book, The Young Professional’s Handbook.

There are any number of potential roadblocks to success for women of color.  Your style being a distraction is an easily removed one.  Don’t let your personal style become a professional distraction.  Get noticed for the things that can make a difference in your career trajectory.

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Well, we’re just hours away from beginning a new year.  I’m looking forward to 2015.   2014 was a good year and I am very much looking forward to continuing the momentum.

By now, I’m sure you have outlined your goals for 2015.  I wish you every success with achieving them.

Did you make your goals big enough to stretch you out of your comfort zone? If they don’t make you take a deep breath, they are not big enough.

Have you developed a plan of action to achieve your goals? If not, then they are not really goals, just a wish list.  Here are the first steps to creating a plan of action.

Goals Need Action to be Realized

Who’s holding your ladder? Have you assessed your support system and determined whether you have what you need to help you succeed in 2015?  Don’t go it alone. 

 Is professional development one of your goals for 2015?  Your professional development is largely your responsibility.  Don’t rely solely on your employer to give you what you need to be the best.  Set aside a professional development budget for yourself.

Part of your professional development and networking strategy should include attending conferences and workshops. I highly recommend Black Enterprise Women of Power.  This year’s conference is being held in Ft. Lauderdale March 2nd-5th.  Follow the link  to view the outstanding line up of speakers and activities.

What trade press should you be reading to keep abreast of your field?  Start with Smartbriefs.com to identify the business brief for your industry.  There is no substitute for being a student of your craft.    It is critical to being taken more seriously.

How will you take care of your spirit in 2015?  Taking care of your spirit is more than just worship.  It is taking care of your body and mind to minimize the ravishing effects of stress.  You must take time for yourself in order to be of good service to those who rely on you.

These are just a few questions to ponder over the next few days. As Iyanla Tweeted recently, “So many of us invest a fortune making ourselves look good to the world, yet inside we are falling apart. It’s time to invest on the inside.”

As we say a fond farewell to 2014, I wish for you all the love, peace, happiness, laughter and prosperity you can receive.  As such, I wish the same for me and my family and friends. We cannot wish for another that which you do not wish for ourselves, for we are all tethered.

I look forward to being of service to you in 2015.

Happy New Year!  Be Well and Prosper!

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In a recent survey of professional women of color, nearly 60% said overcoming stereotypes was a major challenge for them in their workplace.  Stereotypes are borne out of biases and prejudices.  One of the ways old stereotypes are perpetuated and new ones are introduced is through entertainment and media.

The slate of television programming is set, and the season well underway.  It brings mixed expectations.  One television program after the other presents its comedic offering at the considerable expense of women.

And women are now participating in their own degradation in the name of artistic pursuit or more to the point, to pay the bills. But it’s not just entertainment, these television programs that vilify and disparage women, especially women of color.

What is the residual impact of the negative portrayal of women and girls?  Who and what is it giving permission to participate in the devaluation of women of every age?  What does societal devaluation look like?

As more and more women graduated from college and began to move up the ranks in corporate America, women became publicly characterized as dogs (the “b” word) and cats (cougars).  Then we began to act and treat each other like the same.  Television networks are making a fortune with reality shows and dramas based on this.

In viewing trailers of some of the programs for the current season now mid-way, almost none of the networks, in the pursuit of ratings and revenue could resist developing at least one show that sensationalizes the ridiculous and eliminates intelligence, grace and class.

More fights, more bickering, more backbiting are prime-time fare.  Most networks gave into this temptation because based on the ratings (the percentage of people who watch the program), network executives believe this is what women want to watch.  And they would be right because we haven’t told them otherwise.

“My guilty pleasure” is how women characterize these programs. But the impact and influence of television programming is insidious.  Before you know it the behavior and attitudes slip into your psyche and begin to subtly or not so subtly influence you, how you are perceived and how you perceive others.

Television programs are not just a guilty pleasure.  In many instances, television programs are perpetuating negative stereotypes as well as creating new ones. Although television characters are largely presented as fictional, they are who and what television executives and programmers think you are.  And it is influencing how women are perceived and treated by peers and now our children.

Don’t think so?  Why launch a clothing line based on the fashions worn in a top show?  Don’t get me wrong.  There’s nothing wrong with the fashion line that’s been introduced.  But why produce a clothing line if you do not believe the characters and imagery are powerful and persuasive and will influence the audience.

How can the clothes be persuasive and the behaviors not?  How can the audience be influenced by the clothes but not be influenced by the stereotypical actions and behaviors of the characters?   Just something to think about.

A colleague shared with me that he noticed that his teenage son and his friends do not socialize with the black girls in their school.  Why?  Because the boys find it difficult to have a conversation with the girls without the impersonations of certain reality television characters interfering and taking over.

“We can’t have a conversation without eye-rolling, neck popping, or some negative or demeaning comment”  the boys said.

YIKES!  I said. Oh, and they dress like them too, he said!

Seriously? Why are high schoolers walking around looking like reality television personalities?

I know I’m on the verge of pushing water uphill on this.  But the reasons Black women are not taken seriously involve layered complexities tethered to stereotypes that go way back.

They are the types that bind us.  And frankly, we are doing more than our fair share of perpetuating them as well as creating them anew.  While you may get 60 minutes of enjoyment out of your guilty pleasure, it’s not just entertainment.

“When they confront race and gender stereotypes, black women are standing in a crooked room, and they have to figure out which way is up.  Bombarded with warped images of their humanity, some black women tilt and bend themselves to fit the distortion.”   From Sister Citizen, by Melissa V. Harris-Perry.

Which stereotypes are unknowingly plaguing your personal and professional life? Where do the stereotypes come from and why is important that you know? How can you address them if you don’t know what they are?  Is your guilty pleasure helping to paint an unfair picture of who you are?

Register For My 90 Minute Class 

How Women of Color Can Overcome Stereotypes

Life is about choices.  What are you choosing for you today?

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 In a recent survey of professional women of color about the work place challenges they encounter,  two factors bubbled up as barriers to their continued success:

1. Encountering stereotypes
2. Not being taken seriously

Well over half (60%) of respondents indicated that dealing with negative stereotypes was the primary challenge for them. The surprise was not that women of color encounter stereotypes,  but that of nine challenges listed, stereotypes were so prevalent at all levels of accomplishment from manager to senior director, as well as women with PHDs.

In a follow-up group discussion, respondents shared their experiences and the types of stereotypes they deal with on a consistent basis and the impact on their performance and careers.  To be clear, the stereotypes can be either gender or racially based or both.  They include experiences from trying to talk “black” (whatever that is), to having low expectations of intelligence and capability.

Frustration and disappointment are the most common reactions women of color experience with the on-going occurrence of such incidents.   Even companies that have diversity and inclusion programs in place have not provided women employees of color with strategies and tools to help them effectively manage what author and diversity and inclusion expert Stephen Young* calls microinequities.

As a result, some women have opted to leave good positions with reputable companies rather than seek out help and support.  It is more often cited as the primary reason that women of color leave corporate America and strike out on their own.  And it has resulted in an explosive growth of women-owned businesses.

What challenges are you facing where you work?  Are you constantly looking for ways to be taken more seriously by your management and peers?  Could stereotypes and unconscious biases be roadblocks to your success?

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It seems like a simple enough question with either yes or no for an answer.  However, it’s a little more complex than that.  If you answered yes you are prepared, the next logical question is: how have you prepared and have you prepared effectively?

How are you prepared to take on your next goal or task?  Are you prepared for the next opportunity that presents itself?  Your PQ is an indication of how serious you are about your goals and accomplishing them.

Whether you are employed in the private or public sector or own a business, your level of preparation can have a significant impact on your success.

There are at least 4 levels of preparation.  Which level of preparation do you employ most often?

Here are scenarios and questions where your level of preparation can make the margin of difference in your career or business:

1.   An opportunity for a new position is presented to you.

• How quickly could you react and respond and be ready to ace the first round interview?
• Is your resume up to date reflecting important accomplishments?
• Do you know what your core strength is and how you contribute to a team?
• Do you know your management, communication and leadership styles?

If you are just beginning your career path, the answers to these questions are still forming.  However, if you are a seasoned professional, these are answers you should be able to respond to without hesitation.

2.  There’s an important meeting coming up which you are invited to participate or tasked   to lead.

What are the first steps you should take to be prepared to effectively participate and/or lead?  Do you know:

•  The purpose of the meeting and the desired outcome
• The meeting agenda
• Meeting invitees, their respective roles within the organization and on the project at hand
• Your role in the meeting if you are not the leader
• Are there documents that should be reviewed in advance and if so, how far in advance of  the meeting will the documents be published?

3.  You own a business and the opportunity to bid on a contract that seems tailor-made for your company is presented to you.

Your level of preparation is your margin of difference

• Do you have a pre-selected and vetted team of professionals you can call on to assist in the development of the response to the RFP?
•  Do you have responses to standard questions about your company already prepared?
• Do you have case studies that you can present or discuss that illustrate your company’s capabilities?

While thorough preparation may not always be possible, no preparation at all is not a formula for success.  How well you prepare is a huge part of how you will be perceived in your professional environment and professional circles.  It also signals to others how serious you are about the task at hand.

Preparation leads to excellence which leads to effectiveness.  All three are habits that should be developed and baked into the DNA of your personal brand.

Based on your goals and what it is you say you want, what are you prepared for and how have you prepared for it?  Take some time to consider this and adjust accordingly.

In the meantime, remember, life is about choices.  What will you choose for you today?

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